house. Granny and Maisie Mulholland were busy with their knitting in front of a cheerful fire.
Maisie stood up as we entered and went to make some hot cocoa. Granny looked at us over the top of her spectacles. ‘Did Milly get away on time?’
I answered, ‘Yes, she did. The train was on time and her cousin is going to meet her in Glasgow.’
Mum quickly drank her cocoa, then said, ‘I think I’ll get away to bed, as I’m really tired.’
After Maisie left, Granny and I sat looking at the photo album again until I began to feel sleepy.
In the bedroom I tried to be very quiet getting undressed, as I thought Mum would be sound asleep, but when I looked at her, she was wide awake, her face turned towards the window.
When I spoke, she quickly closed her eyes, and I slipped into bed with a dark feeling of something I couldn’t put my finger on. Was it fear or apprehension? I wasn’t sure.
16
MILLY MOVES ON
It was not long after Milly departed for Glasgow that Granny and I became worried about Mum. We would be fine until she came home from work, but as soon as we had our tea she would start complaining about things like the small stain on my school skirt or something equally trivial.
One night I accidentally spilled some tea on my blouse and she exploded with anger. ‘You’re getting very careless, Lizzie. Don’t you have any idea how much your clothes cost? I don’t want your aunt Margaret to keep forking out good money if you’re not going to look after things.’
I didn’t reply, but went to get a wet cloth to wipe away the stain. Rolling her eyes in annoyance, Mum moved away from the table, saying she was going to bed as she was tired. Granny was silent, but I could see she was upset by this outburst, and after Mum went to the bedroom, Granny took out her knitting bag and began to pull out a skein of wool.
‘You can help me roll this into a ball, Lizzie,’ she said.
I obediently held the skein between my two outstretched hands and we sat in silence while she quickly unwound the wool into a large ball.
When she began to cast on her stitches for some new garment, I sat by the fire with my latest library book. It was a true story about a lady missionary who had travelled to Africa to spread Christianity to the natives of a small community in the wilds of the Dark Continent. By the time I was ready for bed I was filled with wonder at this adventurous pioneer and I wished I could be in Africa with her.
I also asked Laura if I could go to her house after school. I loved the hustle and vitality of her parents, even though Laura complained about her father always spouting on about social injustice. ‘He’s like a parrot,’ she said one day, but she laughed as she said it and I knew she didn’t mean it.
The time was drawing near when we would be leaving school and going into the adult world. I envied Laura because she knew what she wanted to do, but I had this restless urge and didn’t know how to deal with it.
‘Are you still planning to go to the teachers’ college?’ I asked her one afternoon as we made our way up the Hawkhill.
She was eating an apple, but she nodded. ‘Yes, I am. Have you made up your mind what you’re going to do?’
I shook my head. ‘Not really.’
I must have sounded miserable because she looked straight at me and asked, ‘Are you still planning a life of adventure, Lizzie?’
‘I think so, but it all depends on how things are at home. Granny and I are really worried about Mum, but we don’t know how to help her. I’ve told you how she’s lived her life in her own little denial bubble, but the trouble is she doesn’t make friends very easily. My dad was the outgoing, sociable person who was good at sport and had loads of pals while Mum was quiet and liked staying in the background. At least that’s what Granny said.’
Laura was sympathetic. ‘Well, everyone is different, aren’t they?’
‘Do you know what she did a few years ago? She went with Milly to a
Maisie stood up as we entered and went to make some hot cocoa. Granny looked at us over the top of her spectacles. ‘Did Milly get away on time?’
I answered, ‘Yes, she did. The train was on time and her cousin is going to meet her in Glasgow.’
Mum quickly drank her cocoa, then said, ‘I think I’ll get away to bed, as I’m really tired.’
After Maisie left, Granny and I sat looking at the photo album again until I began to feel sleepy.
In the bedroom I tried to be very quiet getting undressed, as I thought Mum would be sound asleep, but when I looked at her, she was wide awake, her face turned towards the window.
When I spoke, she quickly closed her eyes, and I slipped into bed with a dark feeling of something I couldn’t put my finger on. Was it fear or apprehension? I wasn’t sure.
16
MILLY MOVES ON
It was not long after Milly departed for Glasgow that Granny and I became worried about Mum. We would be fine until she came home from work, but as soon as we had our tea she would start complaining about things like the small stain on my school skirt or something equally trivial.
One night I accidentally spilled some tea on my blouse and she exploded with anger. ‘You’re getting very careless, Lizzie. Don’t you have any idea how much your clothes cost? I don’t want your aunt Margaret to keep forking out good money if you’re not going to look after things.’
I didn’t reply, but went to get a wet cloth to wipe away the stain. Rolling her eyes in annoyance, Mum moved away from the table, saying she was going to bed as she was tired. Granny was silent, but I could see she was upset by this outburst, and after Mum went to the bedroom, Granny took out her knitting bag and began to pull out a skein of wool.
‘You can help me roll this into a ball, Lizzie,’ she said.
I obediently held the skein between my two outstretched hands and we sat in silence while she quickly unwound the wool into a large ball.
When she began to cast on her stitches for some new garment, I sat by the fire with my latest library book. It was a true story about a lady missionary who had travelled to Africa to spread Christianity to the natives of a small community in the wilds of the Dark Continent. By the time I was ready for bed I was filled with wonder at this adventurous pioneer and I wished I could be in Africa with her.
I also asked Laura if I could go to her house after school. I loved the hustle and vitality of her parents, even though Laura complained about her father always spouting on about social injustice. ‘He’s like a parrot,’ she said one day, but she laughed as she said it and I knew she didn’t mean it.
The time was drawing near when we would be leaving school and going into the adult world. I envied Laura because she knew what she wanted to do, but I had this restless urge and didn’t know how to deal with it.
‘Are you still planning to go to the teachers’ college?’ I asked her one afternoon as we made our way up the Hawkhill.
She was eating an apple, but she nodded. ‘Yes, I am. Have you made up your mind what you’re going to do?’
I shook my head. ‘Not really.’
I must have sounded miserable because she looked straight at me and asked, ‘Are you still planning a life of adventure, Lizzie?’
‘I think so, but it all depends on how things are at home. Granny and I are really worried about Mum, but we don’t know how to help her. I’ve told you how she’s lived her life in her own little denial bubble, but the trouble is she doesn’t make friends very easily. My dad was the outgoing, sociable person who was good at sport and had loads of pals while Mum was quiet and liked staying in the background. At least that’s what Granny said.’
Laura was sympathetic. ‘Well, everyone is different, aren’t they?’
‘Do you know what she did a few years ago? She went with Milly to a
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