Everything Between Us by Mila Ferrera Page A

deep inside my body, and I haven’t yet been able to extinguish it. I’ve kissed guys, but those experiences were nothing like this. Daniel’s body, hard-muscled and powerful, held me to the floor and weighed me down in the most delicious way. His mouth was gentle but commanding, and his hands … I felt terrified and safe all at once, like it was all new, but at least one of us knew what he was doing, and I was ready to trust him completely. When he said you can tell me, if I do something you like, if you want me to do it again … all I could think was yes . Yes. Yes. Yes. I wanted him to teach me everything. I didn’t want it to stop.
    But then it did. He did. And that was it. Too good to last.
    My gaze slips over his cheeks, burnished gold stubble along his jaw, his lips soft and inviting. In some ways, he reminds me of the character Estella from the book we were reading yesterday. He can make people look at him. Want him. Love him. But whether he can or will return those feelings is a different matter. He inspires desire, but what he actually desires is not so clear. Money, I suppose. Success. Sex, maybe. He knows how to get all three. I don’t even want to know how many women he’s been with. What I do want to know: what he’s hiding behind that charming, easy-breezy wall.
    I caught a glimpse last night, I think, after he found me in the enclosed porch. I’d gotten up, a fluttery feeling in my chest, and went to my glass-walled room to break down in private. Beneath the moon, caged within this house and chained by my own pathetic fear, I couldn’t stop the tears. This is how it is, how it has to be. And that means I can’t be with Daniel or anyone else. No prince is going to show up and break this spell. No normal guy is going to magically sense me here and come to meet me, to get to know me. And even if he did—why would he want to stay holed up with me?
    It’s not going to happen.
    Ever.
    I swallow the lump in my throat, the one making it hard to draw breath. Daniel’s chest rises and falls as he slumbers. He covered us with blankets, and we’re safe within our nest, and I’m warm and comfortable … and all I want to do is cry. Only a few inches from me is this guy who I’m starting to fall for, and he’s so far out of my reach that it’s a joke that he’s even here with me at all. It’s only happening because my mom paid him. Maybe she did other things, too. I bet she’s good in bed. Ugh. I shift a little and move my hand, but Daniel’s grasp tightens instantly.
    I wonder who he’s dreaming of. My mom? Some other beautiful woman who knows how to turn him on? Because one thing’s for sure: I don’t. He could tell, too. That’s why he said what he did, because he’d figured me out. He knows I’m as clueless and clumsy about sex as I am about art. I don’t know how to please him; I barely know how to please myself. In those few glorious seconds, I thought it didn’t matter, that he was there because … because he liked me, I guess. I know he thinks I’m funny, and now that I’m not acting like a raging psycho-brat, I think he enjoys our lessons. But that’s quite a bit different than wanting to … ha. Wanting to go out with me. As if going out were even possible.
    Carefully, I untangle my hand from Daniel’s grip. He sighs and turns over, releasing me at last. I’m glad … but not really. I slowly climb out of our nest, not wanting to wake him. I can’t help but stand there watching him for a few moments, though. He’s moved his arm away from his face now, and I can see his closed eyes and slightly crooked nose. I wish … I wish . And that’s all it will ever be.
    I pad down the hallway to my room, where I take a shower and brush my wet hair. The circles under my eyes seem a little fainter, maybe because I got more sleep last night than I usually do. Being next to Daniel, pressed against him on the chaise, listening to him tell me about the places he’s been that I can never go