had a weird feeling that I had woken from a nightmare, but I couldn’t see anything in my head from last night. There were no pictures...no images...no voices. There was nothing.
“I remember nothing Daddy...”
“Nothing? Are you sure that you don’t remember anything? Anything at all...? It’s okay if you do James...but you need to tell me. It’s very very important that you do. It’s so me and Mommy can help you.”
I usually had such a good memory. Even for my age. Mommy used a play a computer game with me where there was a big board of pictures behind rows and rows of boxes. When you found a set of the same pictures on the board, you kept the pair. You had to remember where every picture was on the board in order to find the match. The person with the most sets of matched pairs by the end of the game wins. And I used to win against Mommy...every...single...time. So not being able to remember what happened just hours ago had me feeling all twisted up inside. I kept trying to think, really hard, pushing through the dark in my head, waiting for the memories to appear. I was searching for the flash of an image, like it always appeared because it was that simple for me. But all that came through was black. Like a piece of time was cut out of my memory and thrown away. I shook my head at Daddy. “No...I can’t seem to remember anything. I’m sorry. Am I in trouble?”
Daddy looked even more worried and put his arm around my shoulder, drawing me close to his body. “No son, you’re not in trouble. Everything’s fine...” He blew out a breath, “...it’s going to be fine...”
I didn’t believe him. I could feel my Daddy trembling. Daddy never trembled. Daddy was never scared. He was always a big brave man. We sat there for a long time. It felt like forever.
We heard footsteps and we both lifted our heads to see a man dressed all in blue walking towards us. Daddy got to his feet straight away, taking my hand and helping me to stand up too.
“Mr. White?” the man said to my Daddy. Daddy nodded. “I’m Doctor Fenton.”
“My...my...wife?” Daddy stuttered.
“Your wife Nina is going to be fine. We managed to stop the bleeding. But it was touch and go there for a while — she lost a lot of blood.” The man glanced down to me and then back to Daddy. “Your wife’s a strong woman. A real fighter.”
Daddy coughed like he was choking and then he spoke, his voice all shaky. I felt his grip tighten on me. It was starting to hurt my shoulder. I don’t think Daddy realized he was holding me so tight.
“Yes, she's a fighter. But she’s going to be okay, right?”
“Yes,” the doctor said patting Daddy on the back. “She's stabilized and doing great.”
Daddy swallowed and let go of me. “And the baby?”
The man smiled warmly at Daddy. “Your baby girl is fine too. You and your son can go see them now if you like.”
“A baby girl?” My Daddy took my hand and squeezed it.
“Did you hear that James? You have a sister.”
Daddy started walking quickly with me in tow. It didn’t take long before we got to Mummy’s room. When we both walked in we saw her. Mummy. She was in a bed, all tucked up, like how she tucks me into my own bed at night. Her hair was up on her head, piled high. And she was holding a baby wrapped up in a pale pink blanket. Her smile was huge when she saw the two of us.
“My two favorite men in the whole world.” They were her first words. Her voice sounded so happy to see us. I ran over to her side. Daddy followed quickly behind me.
I looked up to see Daddy’s lips going straight to Mommy’s forehead. “I can’t believe I almost lost you.” Daddy’s voice cracked again. I think he was trying not to cry. He kissed her on the lips, and then cupped Mommy’s face with his hands. “I love you,” he said. “So much it frightens me every minute of every day.” Daddy’s voice cracked again. Poor Daddy. He seemed sad and happy at the same time.
Mommy closed her
“I remember nothing Daddy...”
“Nothing? Are you sure that you don’t remember anything? Anything at all...? It’s okay if you do James...but you need to tell me. It’s very very important that you do. It’s so me and Mommy can help you.”
I usually had such a good memory. Even for my age. Mommy used a play a computer game with me where there was a big board of pictures behind rows and rows of boxes. When you found a set of the same pictures on the board, you kept the pair. You had to remember where every picture was on the board in order to find the match. The person with the most sets of matched pairs by the end of the game wins. And I used to win against Mommy...every...single...time. So not being able to remember what happened just hours ago had me feeling all twisted up inside. I kept trying to think, really hard, pushing through the dark in my head, waiting for the memories to appear. I was searching for the flash of an image, like it always appeared because it was that simple for me. But all that came through was black. Like a piece of time was cut out of my memory and thrown away. I shook my head at Daddy. “No...I can’t seem to remember anything. I’m sorry. Am I in trouble?”
Daddy looked even more worried and put his arm around my shoulder, drawing me close to his body. “No son, you’re not in trouble. Everything’s fine...” He blew out a breath, “...it’s going to be fine...”
I didn’t believe him. I could feel my Daddy trembling. Daddy never trembled. Daddy was never scared. He was always a big brave man. We sat there for a long time. It felt like forever.
We heard footsteps and we both lifted our heads to see a man dressed all in blue walking towards us. Daddy got to his feet straight away, taking my hand and helping me to stand up too.
“Mr. White?” the man said to my Daddy. Daddy nodded. “I’m Doctor Fenton.”
“My...my...wife?” Daddy stuttered.
“Your wife Nina is going to be fine. We managed to stop the bleeding. But it was touch and go there for a while — she lost a lot of blood.” The man glanced down to me and then back to Daddy. “Your wife’s a strong woman. A real fighter.”
Daddy coughed like he was choking and then he spoke, his voice all shaky. I felt his grip tighten on me. It was starting to hurt my shoulder. I don’t think Daddy realized he was holding me so tight.
“Yes, she's a fighter. But she’s going to be okay, right?”
“Yes,” the doctor said patting Daddy on the back. “She's stabilized and doing great.”
Daddy swallowed and let go of me. “And the baby?”
The man smiled warmly at Daddy. “Your baby girl is fine too. You and your son can go see them now if you like.”
“A baby girl?” My Daddy took my hand and squeezed it.
“Did you hear that James? You have a sister.”
Daddy started walking quickly with me in tow. It didn’t take long before we got to Mummy’s room. When we both walked in we saw her. Mummy. She was in a bed, all tucked up, like how she tucks me into my own bed at night. Her hair was up on her head, piled high. And she was holding a baby wrapped up in a pale pink blanket. Her smile was huge when she saw the two of us.
“My two favorite men in the whole world.” They were her first words. Her voice sounded so happy to see us. I ran over to her side. Daddy followed quickly behind me.
I looked up to see Daddy’s lips going straight to Mommy’s forehead. “I can’t believe I almost lost you.” Daddy’s voice cracked again. I think he was trying not to cry. He kissed her on the lips, and then cupped Mommy’s face with his hands. “I love you,” he said. “So much it frightens me every minute of every day.” Daddy’s voice cracked again. Poor Daddy. He seemed sad and happy at the same time.
Mommy closed her
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