Firsts by Laurie Elizabeth Flynn Page A

And you’re a good teacher. But she’s thinking about something else.”
    I look from Faye to Angela, who is trying to avoid my eyes.
    “I bet I know what she’s thinking about,” Faye says, her mouth twitching into a smirk. “It’s a boy.”
    I snap my fingers in front of Angela’s face. “Earth to Angela,” I say. “Is she right?”
    Angela covers her face with her hands. “I can’t concentrate on anything lately. I’m having one of those midlife crisis things.”
    “At seventeen? I don’t think so.” I soften my voice.
    “I’m just, you know, so conflicted.”
    “About what?” I say gently. Angela sounds like she might be on the brink of tears. I have only seen Angela cry once over the course of our friendship, and that was because a teacher chewed her out for reading from cue cards during an oral presentation.
    “About Charlie.”
    Faye plucks her computer off her stomach and rolls over. “I knew it! It’s always about a boy. Boys are the source of all the pain and all the pleasure. Especially the good ones.” Her voice drops into something barely louder than a whisper. My eyes flicker to her involuntarily, and she gives me a tiny smile, almost like she was testing my attention.
    I tear my eyes away from her and look at Angela, who is staring at her hands. “What’s up with Charlie?”
    Angela spins the promise ring Charlie gave her on their anniversary around her finger, something she does when she’s nervous. Or scared.
    “I love Charlie. Charlie loves me. Lately, I’ve been having these feelings.” She sighs. “You know.”
    “I don’t know, Ange.”
    “I know,” Faye says. “You want to spread the love around. Be with other guys. You’re bored with this Charlie dude. Right?”
    Angela furrows her brow. “Not right,” she says. “I only want to be with Charlie. But that’s the problem. I think Charlie wants to be with me, if you know what I mean.”
    I reach my hand out and grab Angela’s. “He wants to sleep with you?”
    Faye interjects. “Wait, you haven’t slept with him yet? How long have you guys been together?”
    “Two years,” Angela says. “But we were going to wait until we got married. Still are. I don’t know.” She covers her face with her hands.
    Faye’s laugh sounds like a bark. A seal—that’s the animal she sounds like. One of those barking seals at the zoo that never shut up. “He must be the last of a dying breed. Nowadays if you don’t give it up till date three, you’re going to find yourself single.”
    She looks directly at me when she says it, and for a second I’m afraid she knows everything, even though that would be impossible. But her gaze is completely disarming. It’s full of confidence, full of certainty. It says, I want what I want when I say I want it . I bet most guys can’t stand up to that gaze. I can just imagine Zach crumbling underneath it.
    But whatever is going on with Faye has to wait. I can probably count the times Angela has gone into the details of her relationship with Charlie on one hand, including this time, and having a third person around is making this even more awkward. Especially a third person like Faye, who is distracting me .
    “So what made you change your mind?” I say, squeezing Angela’s hand softly. “About waiting until marriage. Is Charlie pushing you to sleep with him?”
    Angela shrugs and fiddles with her shirtsleeves, which are way too long for her arms. Angela has never been like most girls in our grade, who wear short skirts and tank tops. She never buys clothes that fit right.
    I’m about to open my mouth to defend Charlie’s loyalty, but I think twice when this morning’s encounter flashes through my mind. You know that little secret I mentioned? Maybe it can be ours.
    “Do you still have yours, Mercy?” Angela says quietly. She doesn’t meet my eyes as she says it. Angela has never asked me this before, but I have thought about what to say if she did. I wonder how long she has