ask.
She looks over her shoulder sheepishly. “How can you tell?”
“I’ve known you for a long time. It’s pretty obvious.”
“I hope Drew couldn’t tell. Am I talking funny or something?”
“Yeah, you talk in a weird baby voice whenever you’re high,” I say, messing with her.
“Seriously?” she asks, dropping the jar of peanut butter on the floor. “You’re really bugging me out. I hope you’re kidding.” She picks up the jar, grabs and spoon and takes a bite.
“I’m just messing with you,” I say. “Your weird food choice gave you away.”
“God Ember, don’t do that to me,” she huffs, joining me at the table. “You totally freaked me out.”
“Well I feel the same way. What’s going on with you and Drew?”
She shrugs, holding her spoon up to the light and examining it. “The thing about Drew is, he’s a really great guy. But he’s also really boring. I mean, he’s never been anywhere—and he doesn’t want to go anywhere either. Traveling isn’t big deal to him. He’s….a settler. And I’m more of a wanderer.”
And more of an asshole. “So who’s the other guy?”
She looks at me with a smile. “His name is Ravi, and Ember, he’s so great. He’s Indian and he has long hair and the most amazing British accent. We work together—he owns the portrait studio—and sometimes we close up shop and drive around and take pictures all day long. Then we go back to the studio and smoke weed and he plays sitar while I look through all our shots, save the good ones and then we touch them up together. He’s so fucking cool, Ember. Unlike boring ass Drew.”
“Uh huh,” I say, crossing my arms and slouching in my chair.
She licks her spoon and stares into space wistfully. “Ravi’s a little older than me—he has three kids. But they’re back in England. He’s divorced, obviously.” She smiles, a naughty gleam in her eye. “And he’s uncircumcised, which is so much better in my opinion. You probably wouldn’t know the difference, Ember. But it’s much….glidier. It’s a smoother ride.”
“So let me get this straight. You’re cheating on Drew for some old Indian man with an anteater in his pants?”
She rolls her eyes and sighs. “I thought you’d understand, but obviously I was mistaken, so nevermind. Forget I said anything.”
“I’m sorry April, but I can’t forget. And you’re right, I don’t understand. Drew is a great guy. He’s funny and he’s thoughtful and he’s totally in love with you. I don’t understand why you’d throw it all away and treat him like shit. What did he ever do to deserve that?”
“Nothing, I just—“ She sighs again, then gets up abruptly and slams her chair against the table. “Why do you have to make me feel guilty, huh? I already feel guilty enough as it is. I know Drew’s a great guy—he’s just not right for me. Why do you want me to be with someone who doesn’t make me happy?”
“If you don’t want to be with him, then fine, that’s the way it is. But don’t cheat on him, April. Have you ever been cheated on? Because let me tell you, it feels pretty fucking shitty. “
“Oh, I get it now. This isn’t about Drew—this is about you.”
“No, this is about Drew. I run with him every other morning. He’s my friend—a friendship you facilitated, by the way—and now you’re treating him like garbage. If you’re going to break up with him, then break up with him. But don’t mess with his head and lie to him and throw his poor salad in the trash. That was a really nice gesture and you just threw it away like it meant nothing.”
She doesn’t say anything at first, just stands there with her arms crossed and a pensive look on her face. Finally she says, “I think this is about you. I think now that you’ve lost a
She looks over her shoulder sheepishly. “How can you tell?”
“I’ve known you for a long time. It’s pretty obvious.”
“I hope Drew couldn’t tell. Am I talking funny or something?”
“Yeah, you talk in a weird baby voice whenever you’re high,” I say, messing with her.
“Seriously?” she asks, dropping the jar of peanut butter on the floor. “You’re really bugging me out. I hope you’re kidding.” She picks up the jar, grabs and spoon and takes a bite.
“I’m just messing with you,” I say. “Your weird food choice gave you away.”
“God Ember, don’t do that to me,” she huffs, joining me at the table. “You totally freaked me out.”
“Well I feel the same way. What’s going on with you and Drew?”
She shrugs, holding her spoon up to the light and examining it. “The thing about Drew is, he’s a really great guy. But he’s also really boring. I mean, he’s never been anywhere—and he doesn’t want to go anywhere either. Traveling isn’t big deal to him. He’s….a settler. And I’m more of a wanderer.”
And more of an asshole. “So who’s the other guy?”
She looks at me with a smile. “His name is Ravi, and Ember, he’s so great. He’s Indian and he has long hair and the most amazing British accent. We work together—he owns the portrait studio—and sometimes we close up shop and drive around and take pictures all day long. Then we go back to the studio and smoke weed and he plays sitar while I look through all our shots, save the good ones and then we touch them up together. He’s so fucking cool, Ember. Unlike boring ass Drew.”
“Uh huh,” I say, crossing my arms and slouching in my chair.
She licks her spoon and stares into space wistfully. “Ravi’s a little older than me—he has three kids. But they’re back in England. He’s divorced, obviously.” She smiles, a naughty gleam in her eye. “And he’s uncircumcised, which is so much better in my opinion. You probably wouldn’t know the difference, Ember. But it’s much….glidier. It’s a smoother ride.”
“So let me get this straight. You’re cheating on Drew for some old Indian man with an anteater in his pants?”
She rolls her eyes and sighs. “I thought you’d understand, but obviously I was mistaken, so nevermind. Forget I said anything.”
“I’m sorry April, but I can’t forget. And you’re right, I don’t understand. Drew is a great guy. He’s funny and he’s thoughtful and he’s totally in love with you. I don’t understand why you’d throw it all away and treat him like shit. What did he ever do to deserve that?”
“Nothing, I just—“ She sighs again, then gets up abruptly and slams her chair against the table. “Why do you have to make me feel guilty, huh? I already feel guilty enough as it is. I know Drew’s a great guy—he’s just not right for me. Why do you want me to be with someone who doesn’t make me happy?”
“If you don’t want to be with him, then fine, that’s the way it is. But don’t cheat on him, April. Have you ever been cheated on? Because let me tell you, it feels pretty fucking shitty. “
“Oh, I get it now. This isn’t about Drew—this is about you.”
“No, this is about Drew. I run with him every other morning. He’s my friend—a friendship you facilitated, by the way—and now you’re treating him like garbage. If you’re going to break up with him, then break up with him. But don’t mess with his head and lie to him and throw his poor salad in the trash. That was a really nice gesture and you just threw it away like it meant nothing.”
She doesn’t say anything at first, just stands there with her arms crossed and a pensive look on her face. Finally she says, “I think this is about you. I think now that you’ve lost a
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