You Can Be Thin: The Ultimate Programme to End Dieting... Forever by Marisa Peer Page A
Authors: Marisa Peer
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histories you will find instructions telling you exactly how to do that.
For many overweight people the weight is simply the presenting problem – the visible effect or symptom of the real problem underneath. Excess weight can have a role, a function and a purpose. Often it is to insulate someone from being rejected or to hide their sexuality from the world or to offer up as a reason for failure: ‘I could have been a success if only I was thinner’, ‘He/she would have liked me if I was not overweight’, or ‘I would have got that job if I wasn’t so fat’, and so on. Once the true reason for the excess weight is uncovered most clients go on to reduce their weight and keep it off permanently.
Addictive Eaters
Lorna had battled with her weight for years. She was a compulsive eater and craved food almost all the time. She told me that she had begun to develop very early and had noticeable breasts when she was ten. Her mother was horrified by this and put her on a very restrictive diet to stop her body developing. Lorna did not want to be denied food and resisted all her mother’s attempts to put her on the grapefruit diet or any kind of diet. While her family were having toast and cereal for breakfast she was given only half a grapefruit. Soon Lorna was banned from eating any kind of cakes, biscuits, desserts or bread although other family members ate them freely and in her presence. Her mother was so determined to make Lorna thinner that she locked the pantry and put her on a 1,000 calorie a day diet. Lorna told me she would volunteer to clear the table and wash up just so she could secretly eat the rest of her family’s leftovers. She would wolf down food from anybody’s plate rather than be denied it. Because she was deprived of food and had no say in the matter, while her friends and family were allowed to eat with no restriction, she developed an obsession with the very food she had been denied: sugar, junk food and refined carbs. She ate them so often, in an outdated need to defy her mother and take back control, she had become addicted to them. We cured the addiction once she understood how and why it had begun.
Solution
The following statements are essential to changing your addiction habits. Remember the explanation I’ve previously given of how they work and use them to work for you:
• I can have whatever I want now but I just don’t need it.
• I am choosing to be slim and healthy for me not anyone else because I can, I am ready, I want to and it’s easy now.
• My understanding gives me power and freedom to be the correct weight for me.
• I recognise addictive foods and happily refuse them.
• Sugar is not a food. I enjoy its absence and feel better without it than I ever thought I did with it.
Like Lorna, Barbara had a very controlling mother. She was not put on a diet but she was not allowed any kind of sweets or biscuits. Her mother very strictly enforced this; at school if the children brought in a birthday cake to share she was not allowed any of it. At birthday parties she was not allowed any of the cakes or chocolate. Her mother could only enforce this when Barbara was small but even in her teens no sugar was allowed in the house. As soon as Barbara had her own money she would buy as much confectionery as she could afford and eat it all at once setting up a long-lasting sugar addiction. She was very overweight but could not stay on any diet as the foods they forbade were the very same foods her mother banned (sweets, biscuits and cake) and she linked pain to being denied them and pleasure to eating them. Diets tell you what you can’t have, many people have a desire to eat the very foods they are forbidden. It is human nature to want the things we are denied, hence people on Atkins who crave fruit when they did not even want it much beforehand. You can only stop eating certain foods by choosing to, not by being made to.
Solution
Use the following statements to give
For many overweight people the weight is simply the presenting problem – the visible effect or symptom of the real problem underneath. Excess weight can have a role, a function and a purpose. Often it is to insulate someone from being rejected or to hide their sexuality from the world or to offer up as a reason for failure: ‘I could have been a success if only I was thinner’, ‘He/she would have liked me if I was not overweight’, or ‘I would have got that job if I wasn’t so fat’, and so on. Once the true reason for the excess weight is uncovered most clients go on to reduce their weight and keep it off permanently.
Addictive Eaters
Lorna had battled with her weight for years. She was a compulsive eater and craved food almost all the time. She told me that she had begun to develop very early and had noticeable breasts when she was ten. Her mother was horrified by this and put her on a very restrictive diet to stop her body developing. Lorna did not want to be denied food and resisted all her mother’s attempts to put her on the grapefruit diet or any kind of diet. While her family were having toast and cereal for breakfast she was given only half a grapefruit. Soon Lorna was banned from eating any kind of cakes, biscuits, desserts or bread although other family members ate them freely and in her presence. Her mother was so determined to make Lorna thinner that she locked the pantry and put her on a 1,000 calorie a day diet. Lorna told me she would volunteer to clear the table and wash up just so she could secretly eat the rest of her family’s leftovers. She would wolf down food from anybody’s plate rather than be denied it. Because she was deprived of food and had no say in the matter, while her friends and family were allowed to eat with no restriction, she developed an obsession with the very food she had been denied: sugar, junk food and refined carbs. She ate them so often, in an outdated need to defy her mother and take back control, she had become addicted to them. We cured the addiction once she understood how and why it had begun.
Solution
The following statements are essential to changing your addiction habits. Remember the explanation I’ve previously given of how they work and use them to work for you:
• I can have whatever I want now but I just don’t need it.
• I am choosing to be slim and healthy for me not anyone else because I can, I am ready, I want to and it’s easy now.
• My understanding gives me power and freedom to be the correct weight for me.
• I recognise addictive foods and happily refuse them.
• Sugar is not a food. I enjoy its absence and feel better without it than I ever thought I did with it.
Like Lorna, Barbara had a very controlling mother. She was not put on a diet but she was not allowed any kind of sweets or biscuits. Her mother very strictly enforced this; at school if the children brought in a birthday cake to share she was not allowed any of it. At birthday parties she was not allowed any of the cakes or chocolate. Her mother could only enforce this when Barbara was small but even in her teens no sugar was allowed in the house. As soon as Barbara had her own money she would buy as much confectionery as she could afford and eat it all at once setting up a long-lasting sugar addiction. She was very overweight but could not stay on any diet as the foods they forbade were the very same foods her mother banned (sweets, biscuits and cake) and she linked pain to being denied them and pleasure to eating them. Diets tell you what you can’t have, many people have a desire to eat the very foods they are forbidden. It is human nature to want the things we are denied, hence people on Atkins who crave fruit when they did not even want it much beforehand. You can only stop eating certain foods by choosing to, not by being made to.
Solution
Use the following statements to give
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