mean?”
“Y-yeah.”
“Okay.”
He took his hand off Buddy’s chest and sat down, his back against one of the chairs in which a corpse was positioned. Bear took the flashlight from him but did not turn it off, aiming it instead at his own face.
“It’s only me, got it?”
Buddy sweat profusely but was immensely relieved. Bear’s face, he thought, flush with the garish light, one eye unseeing, big head bald, was the most beautiful and most terrifying thing he had ever seen.
“Got it, got it.” He rolled over onto his side then sat up, across from Bear, who directed the flashlight beam at the space between them.
“Buddy,” he asked after some time. “What’s wrong with you?”
He didn’t know what to say or where to begin.
“Bear, what happened to Harris? Exactly I mean.”
Bear nodded but he could not see him.
“Harris got bit. None of us knew.”
“ You didn’t know? Julie didn’t know?” His voice wasn’t accusing, it was asking.
“None of us knew. That afternoon we’re outside watching a volleyball game or whatever, and after awhile I kind of notice Harris isn’t around, and then we heard a gunshot.
“I was the first one down in the basement, after Julie—what she had to see, what she saw—Harris had it in his head that Thompson was responsible, I guess. He had Thompson staked to one of those poles Markowski had down in his basement. He’d chained himself to the other. Shot himself through the chest, bled out quick, came back.”
“How did Bobby die?”
“I don’t think Harris meant to kill Bobby,” Bear reflected. “I think that was a mistake. I wonder if he even knew…”
“Who killed Harris? Was it you?”
“I didn’t kill Harris. I killed a zombie down in that basement. Two of them. Harris killed Harris.”
“I’m in a bad way.”
Bear waited silently for him to explain.
“When I was Inside—when I was in prison—they kept me correct. I mean with the meds situation and all. But out here…I’m losing it, man.”
Bear had had his eye on Buddy for some time. When Buddy came back to Eden to find his best friend dead, and his best friend’s woman pregnant, many who knew Buddy had been relieved, thinking him dead and gone all those months. But Bear had detected something was up pretty early on. He’d worked in the health care field way back when, enough to recognize the signs of mental illness, even if he didn’t possess the medical terminology to label what he saw.
“I hear voices,” continued Buddy. “I hear Harris. I hear…I hear voices. They tell me to, to do things. They aren’t really there, are they?”
“No. They aren’t really there.”
“Part of me knows that, but part of me… They’re so real. I can’t…I can’t explain it. I—”
“Let me ask you a question. What happened with you and Markowski, down in that tunnel?”
Buddy shook his head. “I don’t know. I mean, I thought—I think—we fought. He fought hard. I killed him. I think . But, I don’t know. I keep seeing myself sawing his head off in the dark, not even giving him a…a chance. I don’t know which is the real version anymore.”
“Markowski one of the voices you hear?”
Buddy nodded.
“Can you hold it together? I mean, the other night, with Mickey…”
“I can’t believe I…I mean, yeah I can. I can believe I did that. I’ve done things, Bear…things…”
“We both have.”
“No, I don’t think you—”
“ I do .”
“I would never hurt Julie, or the baby, I mean, they’re my…they’re the only reason—”
“I know you would never purposefully harm Julie. But you need to know, if you ever try and harm that woman or child, I’ll end you.”
It wasn’t a threat and Buddy didn’t take it as one.
“You know, one time, me and Harris, we got to talkin’. I told him, I said if I
“Y-yeah.”
“Okay.”
He took his hand off Buddy’s chest and sat down, his back against one of the chairs in which a corpse was positioned. Bear took the flashlight from him but did not turn it off, aiming it instead at his own face.
“It’s only me, got it?”
Buddy sweat profusely but was immensely relieved. Bear’s face, he thought, flush with the garish light, one eye unseeing, big head bald, was the most beautiful and most terrifying thing he had ever seen.
“Got it, got it.” He rolled over onto his side then sat up, across from Bear, who directed the flashlight beam at the space between them.
“Buddy,” he asked after some time. “What’s wrong with you?”
He didn’t know what to say or where to begin.
“Bear, what happened to Harris? Exactly I mean.”
Bear nodded but he could not see him.
“Harris got bit. None of us knew.”
“ You didn’t know? Julie didn’t know?” His voice wasn’t accusing, it was asking.
“None of us knew. That afternoon we’re outside watching a volleyball game or whatever, and after awhile I kind of notice Harris isn’t around, and then we heard a gunshot.
“I was the first one down in the basement, after Julie—what she had to see, what she saw—Harris had it in his head that Thompson was responsible, I guess. He had Thompson staked to one of those poles Markowski had down in his basement. He’d chained himself to the other. Shot himself through the chest, bled out quick, came back.”
“How did Bobby die?”
“I don’t think Harris meant to kill Bobby,” Bear reflected. “I think that was a mistake. I wonder if he even knew…”
“Who killed Harris? Was it you?”
“I didn’t kill Harris. I killed a zombie down in that basement. Two of them. Harris killed Harris.”
“I’m in a bad way.”
Bear waited silently for him to explain.
“When I was Inside—when I was in prison—they kept me correct. I mean with the meds situation and all. But out here…I’m losing it, man.”
Bear had had his eye on Buddy for some time. When Buddy came back to Eden to find his best friend dead, and his best friend’s woman pregnant, many who knew Buddy had been relieved, thinking him dead and gone all those months. But Bear had detected something was up pretty early on. He’d worked in the health care field way back when, enough to recognize the signs of mental illness, even if he didn’t possess the medical terminology to label what he saw.
“I hear voices,” continued Buddy. “I hear Harris. I hear…I hear voices. They tell me to, to do things. They aren’t really there, are they?”
“No. They aren’t really there.”
“Part of me knows that, but part of me… They’re so real. I can’t…I can’t explain it. I—”
“Let me ask you a question. What happened with you and Markowski, down in that tunnel?”
Buddy shook his head. “I don’t know. I mean, I thought—I think—we fought. He fought hard. I killed him. I think . But, I don’t know. I keep seeing myself sawing his head off in the dark, not even giving him a…a chance. I don’t know which is the real version anymore.”
“Markowski one of the voices you hear?”
Buddy nodded.
“Can you hold it together? I mean, the other night, with Mickey…”
“I can’t believe I…I mean, yeah I can. I can believe I did that. I’ve done things, Bear…things…”
“We both have.”
“No, I don’t think you—”
“ I do .”
“I would never hurt Julie, or the baby, I mean, they’re my…they’re the only reason—”
“I know you would never purposefully harm Julie. But you need to know, if you ever try and harm that woman or child, I’ll end you.”
It wasn’t a threat and Buddy didn’t take it as one.
“You know, one time, me and Harris, we got to talkin’. I told him, I said if I
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