wanting to leave, I couldn’t hold her tight enough. My chest ached, and a different kind of panic coursed through me. I realized she could leave me, but I’d never willingly leave her. Losing Toni had just become my number one fear.
Chapter 12
Toni
The aroma of coffee permeated my room so strongly it smelled like it was brewing on my nightstand. I stretched and groaned when I was greeted with pleasantly aching muscles. When I cracked my eye open, I found Jeremy leaning against the doorframe, leisurely drinking a cup of coffee as if it wasn’t weird he was watching Trent and I sleep.
I checked the blankets to make sure he was all covered, which earned me a quiet chuckle from Jeremy. I stuck my tongue out at him, and he rolled his eyes. Yes, we were extremely mature.
“Quit staring at my ass,” Trent mumbled into the covers.
“I wasn’t. Toni forgot to cover up the girls. I’m trying to decide if I like women or not,” Jeremy retorted.
Trent laughed, and I pulled the covers over my chest. “If you have to think about it that hard while looking at Toni’s impressive rack, then you are most definitely gay,” Trent answered, still facedown on the bed.
I narrowed my eyes at Jer. His face seemed sad. He was teasing like he always did, but the laughter didn’t reach his eyes. I hated to see the sparkle fade from his stunning baby blues, but every day he and Cameron hadn’t repaired the rift between them I saw it disappear a little more.
“You saw Cameron last night?” It wasn’t really a question, because Cameron was the only person that brought that look to Jeremy’s face.
Jeremy nodded. “He brought a date to Melody’s gig. We haven’t talked for a few weeks, so he had no idea I was going to be there. But it sucked even though I knew he wasn’t trying to hurt me this time. I guess I believed the women he hooked up with were all attempts to put distance between us.”
“He was with a woman? Are you sure she wasn’t a friend?” I asked hopefully.
Jeremy shot me a look that questioned my intelligence. “That depends. You and Cameron are friends. When you hang out, does he greet you by examining your tonsils with his tongue?”
“He better not, or I’ll rip his fucking tongue out,” Trent grumbled and rolled onto his back.
I ignored Trent’s outburst. He was adorably grumpy in the morning, but I’d have to focus on that after Jeremy didn’t have that heartbroken look on his face. “I think he’s really bi, Jeremy.”
He sighed. “I know.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, took a deep breath, and dropped his arms with a defeated look on his face. “It’s time for me to let him go. I’m not sure how to do that while we’re both here, but graduation is only a few months away. I’m not sticking around after.”
My throat constricted, and a small squeak escaped before I could control myself. The thought of losing Jeremy never occurred to me. We’d been inseparable since the summer Becca and I spent at my parents’ lake house where we met him and Aiden. He was the person I turned to when my best friends moved on with their lives and mine stayed the same.
He was the same age as Aiden, but Jeremy had decided to go with a double major in business and marketing, which delayed his graduation a year past Aiden’s. I loved how ambitious he was and that we would graduate together. It was another sign to me that he and I were like a different kind of soul mates. Stupidly, I’d viewed graduation as a beginning for us, not the end.
“Don’t give me that look, Bite-size, I’m not abandoning you. I don’t think you realize yet, but you aren’t going to need me like you used to. I’m not the main man in your life anymore. Please don’t give me grief over this. I need to move on, move forward, or maybe just move. Please, Toni,” he begged.
I opened my mouth to argue, but I couldn’t deny the pain I saw on his face. I closed it and
Chapter 12
Toni
The aroma of coffee permeated my room so strongly it smelled like it was brewing on my nightstand. I stretched and groaned when I was greeted with pleasantly aching muscles. When I cracked my eye open, I found Jeremy leaning against the doorframe, leisurely drinking a cup of coffee as if it wasn’t weird he was watching Trent and I sleep.
I checked the blankets to make sure he was all covered, which earned me a quiet chuckle from Jeremy. I stuck my tongue out at him, and he rolled his eyes. Yes, we were extremely mature.
“Quit staring at my ass,” Trent mumbled into the covers.
“I wasn’t. Toni forgot to cover up the girls. I’m trying to decide if I like women or not,” Jeremy retorted.
Trent laughed, and I pulled the covers over my chest. “If you have to think about it that hard while looking at Toni’s impressive rack, then you are most definitely gay,” Trent answered, still facedown on the bed.
I narrowed my eyes at Jer. His face seemed sad. He was teasing like he always did, but the laughter didn’t reach his eyes. I hated to see the sparkle fade from his stunning baby blues, but every day he and Cameron hadn’t repaired the rift between them I saw it disappear a little more.
“You saw Cameron last night?” It wasn’t really a question, because Cameron was the only person that brought that look to Jeremy’s face.
Jeremy nodded. “He brought a date to Melody’s gig. We haven’t talked for a few weeks, so he had no idea I was going to be there. But it sucked even though I knew he wasn’t trying to hurt me this time. I guess I believed the women he hooked up with were all attempts to put distance between us.”
“He was with a woman? Are you sure she wasn’t a friend?” I asked hopefully.
Jeremy shot me a look that questioned my intelligence. “That depends. You and Cameron are friends. When you hang out, does he greet you by examining your tonsils with his tongue?”
“He better not, or I’ll rip his fucking tongue out,” Trent grumbled and rolled onto his back.
I ignored Trent’s outburst. He was adorably grumpy in the morning, but I’d have to focus on that after Jeremy didn’t have that heartbroken look on his face. “I think he’s really bi, Jeremy.”
He sighed. “I know.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, took a deep breath, and dropped his arms with a defeated look on his face. “It’s time for me to let him go. I’m not sure how to do that while we’re both here, but graduation is only a few months away. I’m not sticking around after.”
My throat constricted, and a small squeak escaped before I could control myself. The thought of losing Jeremy never occurred to me. We’d been inseparable since the summer Becca and I spent at my parents’ lake house where we met him and Aiden. He was the person I turned to when my best friends moved on with their lives and mine stayed the same.
He was the same age as Aiden, but Jeremy had decided to go with a double major in business and marketing, which delayed his graduation a year past Aiden’s. I loved how ambitious he was and that we would graduate together. It was another sign to me that he and I were like a different kind of soul mates. Stupidly, I’d viewed graduation as a beginning for us, not the end.
“Don’t give me that look, Bite-size, I’m not abandoning you. I don’t think you realize yet, but you aren’t going to need me like you used to. I’m not the main man in your life anymore. Please don’t give me grief over this. I need to move on, move forward, or maybe just move. Please, Toni,” he begged.
I opened my mouth to argue, but I couldn’t deny the pain I saw on his face. I closed it and
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