Forever for a Year by B. T. Gottfred

cried enough already this week to last for the rest of my life, so I didn’t cry even a little. I just felt stupid, so stupid, until Shannon said, “You have to place one foot directly in front of the other, swivel the hips. It feels demented, I know, but it works. And keep your shoulders back; it will make you look like you have boobs,” and I hated her for saying I had no boobs—only I should be able to say that!—but I did what she said anyway, and then Shannon said, “Yeah, that’s great. You got it. You’re a rock star.”
    â€œYou’re amazing!” Peggy said, and leaped up to hug me, only she fell down from her tight dress and everyone laughed at her, except me. I just helped her back to the bed. “I’m such a klutz in this!” she said, and she sounded like an airhead even though she’s smart and a good athlete.
    Then Shannon sat next to us and said, “You guys are cool,” and I don’t know if she meant it like we were always cool and she could see it now that she was getting to know us, or as if she was deeming us cool now that we were her friends. But the weirdest thing was that I actually, oh my gosh, liked her. Like, I thought she was being really nice to me. And she found me a dress that I liked and she taught me how to walk in high heels, and, I don’t know, she was amazing.
    So eventually Shannon and Wanda found dresses they wanted to wear from the hundred they brought over, and then we all put on some makeup—yes, I did, okay, I don’t really like makeup, but I just wanted to try new things, so I put on just a little, okay?—and then when we were all ready, I felt like we were going to walk down the red carpet at the Academy Awards, except we just walked down the stairs to Peggy’s living room, which had one new brown couch, one old red couch, a glass coffee table with fake-gold legs, and a television that was probably worth more than their house.
    I sat on the couch next to Shannon and Wanda, Emma leaned against the wall, and Peggy sat on the floor after she put on a fashion reality TV show. And then we waited. I felt so silly, but worse, I thought the popular girls would get bored and leave even though this is where the party was, and then, just when my leg started bouncing because I was nervous, Katherine came back home. With her were three junior girls, including Shannon’s sister Elizabeth, and two senior boys, and the boys carried two big beer kegs, and all four of the girls carried plastic bags filled with bottles of vodka and tequila and maybe rum. I don’t know how to recognize alcohol bottles very well.
    â€œDon’t the young’uns look smokin’,” Katherine said as she walked past us, though it didn’t feel like a compliment. She led all the older kids into the kitchen, and Shannon, Peggy, Wanda, and Emma followed them so I did too. I mean, I wasn’t going to sit in the living room by myself, right?

 
    16
    Trevor meets Mr. Pain
    During the team stretch before Friday’s run, Coach Pasquini squatted next to me and talked. Quietly. Almost stealthily. But everyone could see him and hear him. So it was odd because the dude was odd. But, Jesus, I was starting to like him. I don’t even know why. Maybe I’m odd. Whatever.
    â€œSo, Trevor Santos. My Mr. Pain. You ready?”
    I nodded. Two seniors who ran cross-country just to look good on their college applications laughed at Pasquini. I tried not to look at them.
    Coach said, “Every day you go out running with the lead pack. Todd placed sixth in the state meet last year. Where did you finish last year at state?”
    â€œI was in California, and I wasn’t running cross-country,” I said, feeling like a complete fool.
    â€œThere, I can see it, you feel stupid. That’s you punishing yourself again. Stop it! I’m glad you weren’t running last year. Because if you were, some other coach would