hear my excuses or accept them. I have been a fool to treat him thus.’
‘Indeed.’
‘Yet, we must not lose him, for I have spoken in depth with Arthur and he is more insistent than ever that I name him heir.’
‘Did you not falsely suggest that I have miscarried a babe or two, as we discussed, to garner more time?’ I asked, unable to disguise my dismay.
Jacob looked weary. ‘I did, and Arthur offered his most insincere condolences. Alas, he has seen these fictitious miscarriages as more reason to name him heir.’
I sighed, heavily, although it was not unexpected.
‘You must go to Matthew and convince him to stay,’ Jacob repeated. ‘There is no other option.’
‘It is your apology he needs, not mine. It is you who must ask him to stay,’ I replied.
‘Do you think I have not tried? I went to Matthew’s rooms to apologise once more, but to no avail. He will not hear it. He merely lamented the loss of our purity in our friendship. He believes that in bedding you, he has irrevocably lost my good opinion. My jealousy was damn poorly timed.’
‘It was,’ I agreed. ‘But did you attempt to explain your jealousy? Surely a man as fine as Matthew could understand the discomfort and difficulty you face?’
Jacob groaned, and ran a warm hand down the length of my throat. I felt my breasts tighten and loins moisten at the gentle caress.
This wicked circumstance was turning me loose.
‘It was a cruel thing for me to say, and a slight that a proud man such as Matthew will find difficult to forgive.’
‘I suppose so.’
‘Would you consider taking Matthew to bed again? To sire an heir?’ Jacob asked softly, kissing me once more.
My answer was immediate. ‘Yes.’
Jacob stilled. ‘Do you love him?’
I laughed. ‘I consider Matthew very highly, Jacob. I would never have accepted him into my bed if not. I do not love him as I do you, never fear.’
Jacob appeared somewhat eased by this confession. ‘Will you speak to him?’
‘Ask him to bed me again?’ I clarified, though it was unnecessary.
Jacob closed his eyes a moment before responding. ‘Yes.’
‘If you will it, Jacob.’
‘If it requires seducing him to make him stay, would you do it?’
‘If it is your will, Jacob, of course.’ If I am truthful the thought of seducing Matthew was an exciting and thrilling thought, though I did not wish to allow Jacob to know this sentiment, just yet — as I so recently had discovered it myself and in truth thought rather poorly of myself for having it at all.
‘Damn you, Janie!’ Jacob’s expression tightened. ‘It is not a matter of me willing it. I want you…’ He seemed unable to complete the sentence, yet after a time he continued. ‘I know you found pleasure in the act with him, the sounds alone confirmed it last night. So I do not appreciate the insinuation that I am forcing you to submit to my cousin against your will. Do you think I am such a beast? Am I such a terrible beast? ’
My beloved’s tone was aggrieved, but guilt assuaged my indignation.
I waited for a moment to create some appropriate response and failed.
Eventually, I decided upon frank honesty. ‘No, perhaps I am the beast. I confess I should be well pleased to have Matthew in my bed again, sinful though it most certainly is. I am sorry if I have made you unduly uncomfortable, and made you think that I do this under sufferance only. I shall tell you now, I do not. Once, I thought I had been given the short straw in the arrangement, but I have begun to think this is not so.’
I heard Jacob’s sharp inhalation. In the strained muscles of his neck, I could see him war with his own sense of jealousy – that which my words had undoubtedly ignited.
I tried to assure him. ‘Fear not, I will speak with Matthew, and most willingly seduce him if such an act is necessary,’ I murmured, and brought a kiss to his soft, ale-laced breath.
‘A most sagacious decision, Janie. One that I admire and equally
‘Indeed.’
‘Yet, we must not lose him, for I have spoken in depth with Arthur and he is more insistent than ever that I name him heir.’
‘Did you not falsely suggest that I have miscarried a babe or two, as we discussed, to garner more time?’ I asked, unable to disguise my dismay.
Jacob looked weary. ‘I did, and Arthur offered his most insincere condolences. Alas, he has seen these fictitious miscarriages as more reason to name him heir.’
I sighed, heavily, although it was not unexpected.
‘You must go to Matthew and convince him to stay,’ Jacob repeated. ‘There is no other option.’
‘It is your apology he needs, not mine. It is you who must ask him to stay,’ I replied.
‘Do you think I have not tried? I went to Matthew’s rooms to apologise once more, but to no avail. He will not hear it. He merely lamented the loss of our purity in our friendship. He believes that in bedding you, he has irrevocably lost my good opinion. My jealousy was damn poorly timed.’
‘It was,’ I agreed. ‘But did you attempt to explain your jealousy? Surely a man as fine as Matthew could understand the discomfort and difficulty you face?’
Jacob groaned, and ran a warm hand down the length of my throat. I felt my breasts tighten and loins moisten at the gentle caress.
This wicked circumstance was turning me loose.
‘It was a cruel thing for me to say, and a slight that a proud man such as Matthew will find difficult to forgive.’
‘I suppose so.’
‘Would you consider taking Matthew to bed again? To sire an heir?’ Jacob asked softly, kissing me once more.
My answer was immediate. ‘Yes.’
Jacob stilled. ‘Do you love him?’
I laughed. ‘I consider Matthew very highly, Jacob. I would never have accepted him into my bed if not. I do not love him as I do you, never fear.’
Jacob appeared somewhat eased by this confession. ‘Will you speak to him?’
‘Ask him to bed me again?’ I clarified, though it was unnecessary.
Jacob closed his eyes a moment before responding. ‘Yes.’
‘If you will it, Jacob.’
‘If it requires seducing him to make him stay, would you do it?’
‘If it is your will, Jacob, of course.’ If I am truthful the thought of seducing Matthew was an exciting and thrilling thought, though I did not wish to allow Jacob to know this sentiment, just yet — as I so recently had discovered it myself and in truth thought rather poorly of myself for having it at all.
‘Damn you, Janie!’ Jacob’s expression tightened. ‘It is not a matter of me willing it. I want you…’ He seemed unable to complete the sentence, yet after a time he continued. ‘I know you found pleasure in the act with him, the sounds alone confirmed it last night. So I do not appreciate the insinuation that I am forcing you to submit to my cousin against your will. Do you think I am such a beast? Am I such a terrible beast? ’
My beloved’s tone was aggrieved, but guilt assuaged my indignation.
I waited for a moment to create some appropriate response and failed.
Eventually, I decided upon frank honesty. ‘No, perhaps I am the beast. I confess I should be well pleased to have Matthew in my bed again, sinful though it most certainly is. I am sorry if I have made you unduly uncomfortable, and made you think that I do this under sufferance only. I shall tell you now, I do not. Once, I thought I had been given the short straw in the arrangement, but I have begun to think this is not so.’
I heard Jacob’s sharp inhalation. In the strained muscles of his neck, I could see him war with his own sense of jealousy – that which my words had undoubtedly ignited.
I tried to assure him. ‘Fear not, I will speak with Matthew, and most willingly seduce him if such an act is necessary,’ I murmured, and brought a kiss to his soft, ale-laced breath.
‘A most sagacious decision, Janie. One that I admire and equally
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