Throwaway Girl by Kristine Scarrow Page B

breathe.
    Marcus’s long legs take huge strides, and I almost have to run to keep up with him. “We’re almost there,” he says to me, laughing. He must see how cold I am. He pulls me towards a rundown apartment building which has more boards than windows. The security door is broken and the light bulbs have been smashed out of the ceiling. It’s dark and damp but Marcus navigates his way easily down the stairwell to his basement apartment. The carpet in the hallway is stained in so many places it’s hard to figure out its original colour. I squeeze his hand a little tighter. I don’t feel comfortable in this place. In fact, I feel a bit scared.
    He unlocks the deadbolt and then kicks the door of his suite with his foot and motions for me to go in. It’s tiny and dark. I notice right away that the walls have several holes. He flicks the light switch on and the warm glow of the small bulb casts shadows around the room. Marcus’s apartment takes me by surprise. There is leather furniture lining the living room, and a big-screen TV dominating the main wall. He even has a leather dining set in the tiny dining room. There is a plush area rug in the middle of the room and a bookcase full of hundreds of CDs and DVDs against the wall. My face must register shock at the extravagant things he owns because he smirks at me and tells me to have a seat.
    I sit on the couch and curl my legs under me, grateful to be out of the cold. Marcus checks his cell phone. He pulls out a bottle from the cupboard and rinses out two glasses that are sitting in the sink. I glance at the coffee table in front of me and see a box of gold jewellery, its contents spilling over the sides. I look around the room, trying to take it all in. I’ve never seen so many expensive things in one place before.
    Marcus slides in next to me and passes me a glass. I eagerly take a sip, wanting the liquid to warm my throat and my insides. He sips his and sets it down and pulls me towards him.
    â€œYou okay?” he asks when he realizes that I’m still trembling. “Do you want to take a hot shower or something?” I shake my head and hold my glass tightly to my chest.
    â€œCome here,” he says, taking the glass from my hand and setting it on the table.
    I tremble harder but Marcus holds me tighter before putting his weight on me and forcing me down until I am lying on my back on the cushions of the couch. He brings his mouth down on mine, gentle at first, his warm breath taking the chill away. I return his kiss and wrap my arms around his neck. We keep kissing, the passion building between us. He slides his hand underneath my shirt and I gasp at the feeling of his cold fingers exploring my body. My mind is racing at the thought of what we are doing and how thrilling it feels. Marcus touches me gently and I feel stirrings I’ve never felt before.
    Marcus slides his hand down my body and I squirm at his touch. He kisses my neck and moves his mouth down to my chest at the same time. I feel scared and excited all at once, but I can’t imagine telling him to stop. He kisses his way back up to my neck and then takes his arms and wraps them tightly around me, flipping us both over so that I’m beside him. He holds me close to him, his chin resting on the top of my head.
    â€œI love you, Bernice,” he says breathlessly. I melt into him, my heart thudding through my chest.
    â€œI love you too, Marcus,” I respond because he’s being so sweet and gentle and he’s making me feel like no one ever has. And he wants me of all people, plain, old unlovable me.
    â€œWe better go,” Marcus says after what feels like a couple of hours of us cuddling. His cell phone keeps ringing and I can tell he’s agitated by it every time it goes off. “Why won’t anyone leave me the hell alone?” he says angrily. He helps me up from the couch, but darkness has clouded his eyes. Whoever is trying